The truth of the matter is that none of us can stop. None of us has the power in and of ourselves... the power to change can only come from outside ourselves - by surrendering to the belief in God's Word, Jesus, and allowing the power of the Holy Spirit to begin to work in our lives. You see, until we relent our will to the Word of our Father, we will continue to try in our own effort or give up... never going to the One place that can help, God. As counterintuitive and cliche as it may sound, we really have to stop doing the work to change and start letting God do the work of change in us. (I believe this is what the feel-good statement, "To let go and let God" means.)
How this works is - our daily cross to bear is - that we surrender our will to God's Will; we must deny our desire to work for the change in us; we must succumb to the belief that when God says He does the work and the work is finished, that He really is doing the work and the work He is doing - is doing the transforming in us...
WE are not transforming our minds - our battle every day, our cross to bear, is returning to the Father's face and admitting that we can do nothing to save ourselves or even make any part of our lives truly better (in any lasting state) unless we look to God to make that change in us AND make room for Him in our lives to do so every day.
We must surrender to His Will every day and then sit and soak in His love for us. That's what will make the lasting changes in us. When we linger in a tub or pool or lake or ocean... our skin begins to get all wrinkly because that organ is soaking up all the water into our tissues. We didn't do anything to make this happen, it happens naturally IF we sit, stay, soak, the process just works. The same is true for being around God - being and staying in His Presence - sitting at His feet. Remember what Jesus said of Mary - that she was doing the only thing needed? (Luke 10:41-42). If we always stay close to the Father, we will naturally begin to soak in everything He is.
So, you want more patience, more forgiveness, less controlling behavior, more joy, more peace, less frustration, more faith, more wisdom, more self-control, less uncontrollable anger, etc... it's all there, at the foot of God, waiting for us to soak up. It's a novel idea and one that isn't heard very often, but our bodies, minds, and spirits were made for this - sitting and soaking - just being. Letting go of our working and our control of everything (and I do mean everything), and letting God fill us and continue His work for us, in us, and around us every moment of every day.
The blessing of letting go is grace, and peace, and rest. No more striving, no more failing, just sitting at Jesus' feet, looking up into His accepting face, seeing his approving smile, mirroring who we really are, and hearing His honoring and encouraging words to us and about us. (I think I'd let go of everything if I could hear that, see that, live in that.) And that is some Good News!